Perfectionism
Perfectionism often looks like high achievement or strong work ethic on the outside, but internally it can feel exhausting, rigid, and never quite “enough.” Many individuals struggle with cycles of self-criticism, anxiety, and burnout, even while appearing capable and successful.
Therapy for perfectionism is not about lowering your standards or losing motivation. It’s about changing your relationship with yourself so your worth is no longer tied to achievement or performance.
What Perfectionism Really Is
Perfectionism isn’t just high standards—it’s the internal struggle when those standards aren’t met.
For many, it develops as a way to feel safe, accepted, or “good enough,” often shaped by early experiences, relationships, or pressure to perform.
How Perfectionism Can Show Up
Perfectionism can be subtle and often gets mistaken for ambition. You might notice:
- Harsh self-criticism or constant inner pressure
- Fear of failure or disappointing others
- Procrastination or avoidance
- Difficulty resting or feeling satisfied
- People-pleasing or over-responsibility
- Anxiety, burnout, or emotional exhaustion
- Self-worth tied to productivity or achievement
When Perfectionism Feels Bigger
Sometimes perfectionism overlaps with patterns seen in OCD—like intrusive thoughts, repeated checking, or rigid rules.
Therapy can help you understand what’s happening and build flexibility, reduce distress, and respond differently.
The emotional cost
Perfectionism can create a sense of control in the short term—but over time, it often leads to
Never feeling "good enough”
constant pressure to do more or perform
Difficulty relaxing
How Therapy Helps
In therapy, we focus on helping you:
-
- Develop a more compassionate relationship with yourself
- Untangle self-worth from achievement
- Reduce shame and fear around mistakes
- Build tolerance for imperfection
- Understand the roots of perfectionistic patterns
- Strengthen emotional regulation and flexibility
When perfectionism is understood as an adaptation—not a flaw—real change becomes possible.
Frequently asked questions
What causes perfectionism?
Perfectionism often develops around fear of mistakes or criticism. Over time, achievement may become tied to self-worth. Therapy helps you understand that pressure and respond with more flexibility.
Is perfectionism a form of OCD?
Perfectionism and OCD sometimes overlap, but they aren’t the same. OCD involves intrusive thoughts and compulsions that reduce distress or uncertainty. A therapist helps you understand which patterns fit your experience.
Can perfectionism cause anxiety?
Yes. Perfectionism often increases anxiety because mistakes feel unusually high-stakes. You may check your work repeatedly or second-guess decisions. Therapy helps you respond to uncertainty with more flexibility.
Why does perfectionism lead to procrastination?
Perfectionism may make starting feel risky when you fear falling short. You may delay a task while waiting to feel more prepared. Therapy helps you move forward without needing perfect conditions.
How does therapy help with perfectionism?
Therapy helps you understand the fears that keep perfectionism in place. You may learn to respond differently to mistakes and separate your self-worth from performance.
How do I stop being a perfectionist without lowering my standards?
You don’t need to abandon high standards. Therapy helps you maintain meaningful goals while reducing the fear associated with mistakes and imperfect outcomes.
When should I see a therapist for perfectionism?
Therapy may help when perfectionism creates ongoing stress, makes decisions harder, or leaves you feeling dissatisfied with your work, even when you’ve done well.
Does perfectionism affect relationships?
Yes. Perfectionism may create pressure around expectations or fear of disappointing others. Therapy helps you notice those patterns and build more flexibility in your relationships.
A Different Way Forward
You don’t have to choose between striving and self-acceptance.
Therapy helps you keep what matters—your drive, your values, your goals—while letting go of the patterns that keep you stuck.
start feeling more
flexible, confident, and at ease.
Get In Touch
offices
1896 N 1120 W, Provo, UT 84604
2975 W Executive Pkwy, Suite 272, Lehi, UT 84043